Today I’m Crying: That’s Good News

Last night I really struggled.
I stared the blade
Shiny and very sharp
I pressed it onto my skin
But those who know,
Know that’s not what cuts.
I pulled and it scared me.

Before I was beyond being scared
Before I’d sink deeper in
Rather than being jolted out
I stopped.
I looked myself over and
Put the blade away.
I threw the tissue out
There’s not enough to need that.
I went to bed
But couldn’t go to sleep.

Today I wrote you,
‘Of course’ my only answer
How could you not know?
And when I got home
I read your response…
And it wasn’t nearly enough
You seemed relieved,
But I’m not.
I was honest,
Why am I not relieved?

But then I started crying
And that’s an improvement
Today I’m crying and
That is winning one step at a time.
I’ll let them lay on my cheeks until they dry
They’re my accomplishment today.


2 thoughts on “Today I’m Crying: That’s Good News

  1. It’s okay, just cry. Let it all out. God cries with you. She sees all and don’t fret. All will be made right. And this moment will make sense, fade, & there will be nothing but sunshine and rainbows, and you will be richly rewarded!


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