Girl, I know you still pray everyday that it works out. I know you try to love. I know you’re your very best self right now. I know you’re doing what’s right so you don’t have to face God and confess any different. I am so proud of you for that. Like super proud.
But I just had a vision.
You sign your name on those papers you fought for so long against. I’m with you, if only in spirit, and I look over at you and ask: Baby how you feelin’? You hit play on your phone, with the volume maxed out and it’s 9 seconds in to Good as Hell. And you know what’s great? In that moment, you are. You have freed yourself from your regrets and forgiven yourself for all the petty wrongs. You have fought hard, and well, and you never gave up. But it is over. In that moment you have incredible peace, and you actually feel like you could sing that song at the top of your lungs without reservation.
I can see that moment. Whatever path your life takes. If it ends up there, I can see you being good. I hope you see it too.
Your partner in crime and innocence,